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Booty Blog #5: Beads, Plugs, and Trainers Oh My!

By: Lilith

The first thing to consider when looking for beginner anal toys is to figure out what your bumtastic goal is. Whether you are experimenting with a partner or simply trying it solo, there are so many possibilities in regards to booty play that having some direction is a good place to start. A kind of choose your own bunghole adventure-

  • I want to focus on anal sensations and including it into my sex routine but not overly interested in anal sex with a strap-on or penis.
  • I want to work up to being able to have anal sex with a strap-on or penis.

Let us consider first if anal sensations are what you are interested in exploring. If you consider anatomy (Check out Booty Blog #2) then we know that most of the nerve-ending are found in the first few inches of the butt and that is what makes bum play so pleasurable. When it comes to anything anal related the key is LOTS OF LUBE and TAKE IT SLOW AND STEADY. There is nothing worse than experimenting with yourself or another and accidentally hurting them and that can happen if you don’t take your time. Some of my favorite sensation-based toys are:

Option 1: I want to focus on anal sensations and including it into my sex routine but not overly interested in anal sex with a strap-on or penis.

  1. Anything size small or medium from the Platinum line of silicone butt plugs by Doc Johnson. They come in a variety of sizes that are great for any gender. I personally love using silicone toys for butt stuff because they are incredibly smooth and soft without being to flimsy and soap and water cleans them perfectly. Platinum products are hypoallergenic and phthalate-free so they are body-safe for everyone. These toys are specifically great because they don’t get in the way of any other sexual play which makes them great for getting used to having something in your butt. They are also fantastic because the soft silicone lets the body get accommodated to it and thus it doesn’t feel like a hard foreign object that is uncomfortable.While experimenting some notice that having a plug in feels like it can pop out at any moment. This is very common but an easy solution is to find a toy which has a nice narrow stem or neck so that the sphincter can close around it rather than being left open by a wide stem.
  • When looking for anal toys you’ll notice that almost all of them have a nice wide base and this is important to make sure the toy does not pull a Houdini act and disappear.
  1. A go-to which is often advocated for first time booty play is anal beads. There are so many types of anal beads on the market and because of the simple design there are many that are great for play. Silicone is generally the best but jelly material is also great. Booty Call is especially good for simple anal toys including beads. The great thing about beads is that you can slowly work your way up to thicker beads without having to upgrade the toy constantly. There is usually some space between beads which makes it easy to work slowly on getting larger penetration. It also feels amazing to slowly withdraw them as all those nerve-ending are touched. You can also experiment with more length as beads can be quite long. A positive/ negative of beads is that they are often for manual use only, meaning that you have to keep a hold of them when playing. The loops are usually made of the same soft silicone which makes it easy to accidentally slip inside too far. Yet keeping a hold of this toy is great for couples experimenting and the toy is great for all genders as well.
  • Always use lubricant when doing butt stuff. To learn more about lubricants and different kinds great for exploration of the back door check out Booty Blog #3.
  1. If prostate play is what’s on the menu then the toy has a unique shape specifically engineered to find and excite that part of the male body. Just like the elusive G-Spot on women, the P-Spot for men can be difficult to find. Products like the Silicone Prostate Locator by Dr. Joel is a great way of starting prostate play without breaking the bank or the ass. The curve found in these kinds of toys is what allows it to be so successful in creating pleasure and finding the prostate. While experimenting with the prostate, try gently rubbing back and forth to get the prostate to swell and thus become more sensitive. Men can experience some of the most intense orgasms of their lives when prostate play is added to the routine but it does take practice to find and stroke the gland in just the right way. Prostate play is also unique to those with male anatomy only.
  2. Vibrating is also a fantastic way to get your bum excited and can be used to get ready for deeper penetration or simply because it feels amazing. With all of those nerve-endings in the bum, for beginners vibration is totally new to those nerves and can be overwhelmingly pleasurable. It can also help individuals to loosen up in a literal and figurative way. Kits like Anal Fantasy’s feature multiple different heads and a very simple vibrator to experiment with and enjoy. These kinds of kits however are often for manual use only as there are no bases to some of the attachments.
  • Sometimes you will find kits with desensitizing cream. I strongly recommend that you never use desensitizing cream for anal play. Your body is a high functioning machine which tells you when you are going too far and/or too fast, listen to it. Desensitizing creams also take the point out of experimenting with anal; the whole point is to feel the sensations and not necessarily how fast you can push yourself or another to larger penetration. They are also usually not good for the body and can cause minor changes to the chemical makeup of your body.

Option 2: I want to work up to being able to have anal sex with a strap-on or penis.

When it comes to building up for deeper anal penetration or more simply anal sex, the goal is not so much sensations in the first few inches but going deeper and bigger over time. Toys discussed early like plugs or beads will feel pleasurable but none of them but the largest are anywhere near the size or length of an average penis or dildo. Furthermore, the shape of most plugs, vibrating or not, is not the same as instruments for anal sex. The best way to build up to anal penetration and what is most affordable usually is to get anal training kits. There are tons on the market and really your choice will depend on the preference of shape and material. As I’ve noted before, I prefer the feel of silicone for my toys however others enjoy jellies. These training kits often have three or more different sizes to build up too and often are shaped for continued movement in and out of the bum rather than just staying in and leaving them. In my experience talking to new anal explorers at the store, many are reluctant if not downright saying no to the largest of the anal toys in these kits. It is important to remember that you don’t have to work your way up to that size and that with patience your body (anatomy speaking) can easily accommodate that size.

Once you’ve gotten to a comfortable point of your anal exploration and you want to try anal sex start very slow and maybe warm up with your partner doing other fun stuff in the bedroom to make
them feel more relaxed. Remember that shit happens and the deeper your bum-play is, the more likely you will encounter poop. You can try an enema or douching kit beforehand to try to cut down on the mess but remember that you really shouldn’t do this more than once a week no matter how much you love butt stuff and to always use only lukewarm water with no chemicals. Pegging starter kits are also great for beginning to explore anal sex because they are often inexpensive and have short, narrow pegs for easy penetration. After enjoying that for a while you can always upgrade to big and better strap-on kits.

Filed under: The Booty Blog

About the Author

Posted by

Alexandria Nuttal is an active sex educator, activist and writer in Ottawa, ON. With a Master's degree in Women and Gender Studies, her writing and workshops are educational, approachable and a ton of fun. She also currently works in a local adult store and actively advocates for sex-positivity. With a love for BDSM, reading and Ottawa's GLBTQ culture, you'll be sure to laugh and learn something from Alexandria and have fun doing it.

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